8,101

Music: "Clarity" by Zedd
11p

I'm not a hauler anymore.

As I write this, I'm still not sure what to feel. As much as I'm saddened to say those words, because I feel like I'm giving up something I fought so hard for, I'm also proud of what I have done looking back. Unlike when I got the job as a hauler, and I felt the weight of the world lifted off of my shoulders after so long, this time...is very different. I wasn't fighting for my life. I wasn't worried where my future with the company would end up. I wasn't at the end of my rope in every way you could ever imagine. This time, I simply needed a break. The title above refers to different numbers during my time as a hauler. On the 8th day of the month, marking my 10-month anniversary, and what was then my one and only shot of getting out of the hell that was unloading. I've more than proven myself; I fought for it and I won. Even though I didn't make a year like I thought I would, fate had other plans. I'm simply burnt out, and an injured arm did not help matters. Oh, I could still go on and haul another 10 months if I wanted to, but I'm opting out to test the waters and also give my arm a chance to heal and rest. Oh, and you're probably wanting to know the good news! I'm transferring into a quality control associate. I'm playing with the big guns now. I won't be on production for the first time in a year and a half. I get to actually take time and interact with people, instead of having to speed away to grab this or make my numbers. Waiting for that damn phone call drove me batty.

I woke up yesterday morning, anxious to get the dentist out of the way, and on to the next thing: the phone call. But when I got home, and the call never came, I figured it wasn't meant to be. Well, sorry arm, but you're just gonna have to keep going until I have to saw you off. With learning about what I have to do next with my teeth, plus not seeing John, and the other stuff (still not satisfied), I was depressed. What is it about Mondays that make me so down? The morning wore on, and still no phone call. So, at my sister's request, I packed an overnight bag, and drove myself out to Cypress to see my sister and the kids. The kids are nothing but spoiled brats, and I didn't see half of them until that night, when we went bowling. They didn't even come out to say hi to me. Not long after I got to the house, my sister and I were looking at stuff on her computer, when my phone started ringing. Here we go with the idiot telemarketers again! Sound familiar yet? Once again, it was the DC. 'You got the job, you still want it?' The hell do you guys always ask me that? Okay, I know it's probably their protocol, but whatever. So I accepted, and was told that everything would be drawn up by the time I return to work on Friday. So after screaming and giving my sister a big hug, I was finally able to wipe away another worry, and finally announce to the world I had the job. I didn't tell anyone about it this time around, mostly because I didn't want to get my hopes up, and for the element of surprise, the fun part. 

I suck at bowling, and just when I found my inspiration for knocking down pins (yeah, I imagined the pins as being his head *muttering* stupid friends....), the games were over, and people were packing up. That's when John called me. I talked to him on the way back to the house, and told him about the job. Always nice to talk to him when he gets a free moment. Lets me know he's thinking about me....unlike some people....

I kept thinking back about how the events had played out. I'm glad I got the job, but now the nervous part sets in all over again. They gonna teach me to drive the big machines now? Oh, God, might want to evacuate the building for a day. Or better yet, put me in Phase 1. Yeah, nothing to destroy over there. If in six months I decide I don't like QA, it will be the first of the year, and I can always go back to hauling if I so choose. I'll even get to play on the new machines by then hopefully. It's a quiet victory (unlike when I got the hauler position, and I cried for a week). I'm excited for the opportunity. I think I can handle a couple more weeks tearing around the warehouse. I'm losing some things, like I won't have my same manager anymore. I won't get to tear around the warehouse with the other haulers, but I won't have to worry about going into those blasted aisles where people try to kill you. 

I have another hurdle to jump over, and that's jury summons tomorrow. I'm off to quietly celebrate another victory, and pray they let me go tomorrow. THAT will be a victory in and of itself! 

Until next time....

And on a side note, while driving home from Cypress today, fighting rain and real traffic for the very first time, I remembered the last time I celebrated a victory, and when I was able to, plugged in my iPod and searched for the song. Yes, THAT song. If you don't remember, you might want to re-read my blog titled "One word: wow". Yes, I played the song..twice in a row before I'd finally made it home. If the day was gonna do it, might as well do it all the way, right? 

"There's nothing to crowd my mind..." And with that, I'm saying goodnight.