Just when you thought it was safe...

Music: the air conditioner. Where's my blanket....
12a

I was working on another post when I decided to post this one instead. I'll post that one eventually. I thought I would be too sore today to do much else but mill around on the computer.

Wrong!

Things went smoother than I thought they would this morning. I was up before 7 and feeling a little nervous. I went on to the dentist, and didn't have to wait very long. I was ready to get this over with! I got a room with a view, and I got to look at....the ceiling, ha ha. The worst part of the whole process was when they drilled out the tooth, and breathing in that stuff is nasty. I kept holding my breath. They took an impression by sticking a popsicle stick-like thing with a jelly-like substance in my mouth and told me to bite down for two minutes. Okay, I'm timing you! Five minutes passed, and I thought I was going to lose my hold on it from fatigue. My jaw was shaking. I kept calm and pictured John sitting across from me, my moral support. The first impression didn't take, so they had to do another one. Great. Another eternity of clamping down on my jaw. Take it out already! :P

They finally got what they needed (a violent gag-reflex doesn't help matters), and I was asked to come back in tomorrow to have the crown itself put on. The nurse popped a temporary one on for the time being. I didn't think about the fact that crowns are either silver or metal.

I had braces for four years.

Waking up with a metal taste in your mouth every morning sucks. 

So I am hoping that the official crown itself is ceramic or porcelain. I'm thinking that won't be as bad as having this metal crap in my mouth right now. The taste is rather interesting. I'd really prefer not to have that sensation the rest of my life, no?

I came home and thought I'd just rest the whole day, but now I needed to see about my printer, check my paycheck to be sure they paid me for my days off, clean the bedroom, fill up my car and go to the store. Ugh. I'd planned on doing all of this tomorrow when I wasn't sore. And I really wasn't all that sore (they numbed the side of my mouth they were working on), except for a mild headache. I am just so glad to have the worst part of this out of the way...

So looking things over, I realize I probably won't meet my goal of getting my own place this summer. I wasn't expecting all of the medical bills to pile up, but I sure as hell don't want to be in debt. Especially not when looking for apartments. Am I disappointed? Not really. The question is "what can I do to make this happen?" And it will happen, it just won't come as soon as I'd hoped. What I really want at this point is to just get all of these problems fixed, pay off what I can, and save every penny I can. I want to be beautiful again and get my confidence back, and this will be a huge step. I know it is hard for my friends to understand why I feel the way I do, but having their support means the world to me. And I do have their support. I am strong, and I will get through this. If I can make over 6 months in the worst kind of hell you can imagine, then this should be a piece of cake! 

I feel empowered all of a sudden...blame it on the drugs, but I really do feel that this is all just part of the bigger picture. I'm not trying to push or rush things...but I hope this means my life is truly about to start. 

I am going to try to finish my other blog tomorrow. Til then, goodnight.